"In all of living have much fun and laughter. Life is to be enjoyed, not just endured!"
~ Gordon B. Hinckley

Friday, December 2, 2011

A Happier Stomach

Well, one nice thing about all this daily on-off nausea nonsense, is that it makes days where I actually feel good seem like holidays! That being said, most days are not holidays. Which isn't fun.

My symptoms have been getting milder in general post-marriage, but they're still a pretty frequent thing. And it's frustrating never knowing if 10 minutes from any given moment I'll feel awesome, or be trying not to puke. So...it's time for an endoscopy. I'm absolutely terrified. I HATE stuff like that. Medical procedures, an IV, laying on a table, having to swallow nasty-tasting spray, having them shove something down your throat and blow air into your stomach, gagging, choking, ugh. It sounds just awful!! I've been reading about it online and about personal experiences with it and a lot of people said it's cake and it's over in 5-15 minutes. Which is great once it's over...but that still means I have to go through 5-15 minutes of misery and being terrified and nauseous, and that's a long time to feel like that! I'm sure I'll be glad I did it once it's over, but it's the actual going through it part that I'm so scared about. 

This has been something I've put off for a couple months now. Mostly because it sounds so awful, and party because I've heard from a bunch of people that they didn't even find anything. What a waste of money and nerves! It's time to stop avoiding something that could potentially help me, especially since I'm leaving my job with cush benefits soon. So for my Christmas present to myself, I'm going to schedule an appointment and get it over with. Then no matter how much a fret and worry, and how awful it is, it will be done. And I will be free to enjoy the Holiday without it hanging over my head!

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